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12 Days of Bush – On the Twelfth Day of Bush… January 20, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the Twelfth Day of Bush that Fuck Head gave to me…

 

Twelve Billion spent in Iraq every month

At no point did you do anything productive. Everyone here is worse of because of you. I award you no points and my god have mercy on your soul. You son of a bitch.

At no point did you do anything productive. Everyone here is worse off because of you. I award you no points and may god have mercy on your soul. You son of a bitch.

Eleven children is learning

Ten Trillion Dollar Debt

Nine Pretzels choking

Eight Years of warring

Seven Cheney’s shooting

Six Executed Husseins 

Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive Years in Iraq!

Four Hijacked Planes

Three trampled Constitutional Rights!

Two drunken daughters

… And lower taxes for the wealthy.

 

Good luck to Barack Obama. He’s going to need a lot of it.

Also, I’m pretty excited for Joe Biden’s Vice Presidency. He’s going to be the next Dan Quayle.

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12 Days of Bush – On the Tenth Day of Bush… January 18, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the Tenth Day of Bush that bafoon gave to me…

Bush wasn't subtle about asking the players who wanted to do cocaine during half-time.

Bush wasn't subtle about asking the players who wanted to do cocaine during half-time.

“When I was young, I did not see a single soccer match. Where I came from, football wasn’t played. The sport simply did not exist…”

also… 

“The thing that’s wrong with the French is that they don’t have a word for entrepreneur.”

 

What’s wrong with W. is that he doesn’t know the word for common sense. 

Enjoy the Conference Championships.

 

 

And lower taxes for the wealthy.

12 Days of Bush – On the Eighth Day… January 16, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the Eighth Day of Bush that jerk wad gave to me…

I swear... I didn't do anything when I was in office. I swears.  Can I still have a cookie?

Honest... I didn't do anything when I was in office. I swears. Can I still have a cookie?

“I do remain confident in Linda. She’ll make a fine Labour Secretary. From what I’ve read in the press accounts, she’s perfectly qualified.”
Austin, Texas, 8 January, 2001

For those who don’t know, Linda didn’t work out so much as Labour Secretary. Turns out you shouldn’t give money to illegal immigrants if you want to be in charge of labour. Also, Bush continued to prove that the reports that he receives are as accurate as a drunk homeless person with vertigo trying to pee into an upside down dixie cup.

12 Days of Bush – On the Seventh Day January 14, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the Seventh Day of Bush that moron gave to me…

A bumb the President will never be able to un-bump.

A bumb the President will never be able to un-bump. Though 'un-bumping' has never been his style... that's a cocaine joke for all you straight edge kids.

“This thaw—took a while to thaw, it’s going to take a while to unthaw.”— Alexandria, La., Oct. 20, 2008

Extra Special Days of Bush Bonus – During Georgey’s last presidential press conference these things happened… (Note: Grammatical mistakes in following quotes were George W. Bush’s. He clearly was busy doing blow during second grade english class)  the source Time.com care of: Some stupid blog.

“Clearly, putting a “mission accomplished” on a aircraft carrier was a mistake. It sent the wrong message… Obviously, some of my rhetoric has been a mistake.”

“You don’t — you don’t get to have information after you’ve made the decision. That’s not the way it works.”

and the coupe de gras… “Abu Ghraib, obviously, was a huge disappointment, during the presidency. You know, not having weapons of mass destruction was a significant disappointment. I don’t know if you want to call those mistakes or not, but they were — things didn’t go according to plan, let’s put it that way.”

Yeah… let’s put it that way W. It sounds much better than putting it this way, ” Abu Ghraib… huge embarrassment to the country and our military. Nothing like Marines staking prisoners naked in the middle of a prison while taking pictures to improve diplomacy. Oh, and our premise for invading a foreign country to confiscate Nukes… yeah, was never gonna happen cause this whole war is about military positioning and stealing oil… which didn’t work out either.”    and you thought you had a bad day.

 

… and lower taxes for the wealthy.

12 Days of Bush – On the Sixth Day of Bush January 13, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the Sixth Day of Bush that douche bag gave to me…

Bush later had the Easter Bunny waterboarded until he admitted to killing Jean-Beney Ramsey.

Bush later had the Easter Bunny waterboarded until he admitted to killing Jean-Beney Ramsey.

“The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the – the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice.”
Washington DC, 27 October, 2003

 

This explains a lot about the overall “success” we’ve had in bringing oil out of Iraq, I mean bringing democracy to the Iraqis. 

ALUMINUM TUBES!!!

 

…And lower taxes for the wealthy.

 

 


The Fifth Day of Bush January 12, 2009

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Heh, eh, heh... I feel purrty. Cheney! Get me sum facial cream for ma face. Actually, stay away from ma face Dick. Don't ever get towards ma face with anything. 

 

Heh, eh, heh... I feel purrty. Cheney! Get me sum facial cream for ma face. Actually, stay away from ma face Dick. Don't ever get towards ma face with anythin.

On the Fifth Day of Bush that fuck-up gave to me…

“I want to thank my friend, Senator Bill Frist, for joining us today. He married a Texas girl, I want you to know. Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me.”
Nashville, Tennessee, 27 May, 2004

An unfortunate quote for a man named Bush.

Speaking of which, does anyone else realize that our country has been run by Bush and Dick for 8 years. No wonder the state of our nation is so messy. Hope Obama brought paper towels.

12 Days of Bush – On the Fourth Day of Bush… January 10, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the fourth day of Bush, that jackass gave to me…

Eh, heh... heh, the enemy has terned der lights out.

Eh, heh... heh, the enemy has terned der lights out. Sa damn's a tricky dick. Hard to see too.

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”  

Uttered by Georgie on the 5th of August, 2004.

If there’s one thing that W. claimed to be true… it was this statement. Way to totally Donkey Punch your own nation over 8 years.

12 Days of Bush – On the Third Day of Bush… January 10, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the third day of Bush that nitwit gave to me…

Hey girlie. You should pay attention to my ball technique like Roger Rabbit here. He's heppy too. Heh, I like that.

Hey girlie. You should pay attention to my ball technique like Roger Rabbit here. Also, ya know what a FUPA is? Is a medical terminology.

“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country.”
Poplar Bluff, Missouri, 6 September, 2004

As you can see in this picture, W. knows a lot about practice, exercise, women and biology… all at the same time. Hi-ooooo!

12 Days of Bush – On the Second Day of Bush… January 9, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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On the second day of Bush, that Jackass gave to me…

He's either laughing or sliding into first and feeling something burst.

He's either laughing or sliding into first and feeling something burst.

“For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times.”
Tokyo, 18 February, 2002

Yeah… apparently those two plutonium experiments were a joint venture. I ask you, is our flipper babies learning?

Source.

Not only did we drop Nukes, we took photos for sentimental reasons. We are such dicks.

Not only did we drop Nukes, we took photos for sentimental reasons. We are such dicks. *Actual Photo of Nagasaki.

12 Days of Bush – On the First Day… January 8, 2009

Posted by The Ringer in 12 Days of Bush.
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There’s only twelve days left of the reign of terror known as George W. Bush’s presidency. The Stranger will bring you 12 pictures and twelve quotes that will help you remember how Georgey Boy touched us all. Today being the first day of Bush, you get 2 for 1. Enjoy, or cringe. The choice is yours.

BUSH/

George W. Bush; 43rd President of the United States; gave props to Santa, made adults laugh, and bewildered children. He was an ambassador to us all.

“I’ll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office.”

Washington DC, 13 May, 2008

“See, the interesting thing that’s happened during my presidency is twofold: One, there’s been clarity for people to see the world the way it really is — a failed leadership of Hamas in Gaza, for example, or the true aims of these extremist killers — plus the emergence of thought in Israel that the only way to exist in the long term is for there to be a Palestinian state. And it’s a powerful idea. And therefore, I believe in powerful ideas, and I believe with U.S. help that the negotiators can come up with the definition of a state.”

Washington DC, 13 May, 2008

Read the interview here.